Things I Wish You Knew Earlier

Dear younger me,
I wish I could sit beside you for a while, somewhere quiet, where neither of us has to rush anywhere. I'd let you talk about your dreams, your favourite people, the things that make you happy, and all those little problems that feel like the end of the world right now. I wouldn't interrupt you or tell you how everything turns out. I'd simply listen, because I know there are so many things you're trying to understand on your own.
First, I want you to know that you don't have to grow up so quickly. I know you're always looking forward to the next stage of life, thinking that everything will become easier once you're older. But growing up doesn't mean suddenly having all the answers. Sometimes, it means having even more questions and learning to live with the ones you cannot answer yet.
Please stop worrying so much about what everyone thinks of you. I know you'll replay conversations in your head, wonder whether you said something wrong, and sometimes feel embarrassed about things nobody else even remembers. One day, you'll realise that most people are busy thinking about their own lives, just as you are. You don't have to make every person understand you, and you don't have to change yourself to be liked by everyone.
You'll meet people who become incredibly important to you. Some will stay longer than you expected, while others will slowly become strangers. I know that sounds unfair, especially when you've imagined certain people being part of your life forever. But not every goodbye means something went wrong. Sometimes people grow differently, circumstances change, and life takes everyone in directions they never planned.
And when someone leaves, please don't immediately assume that you weren't enough. You can be a good person and still not be the right person for someone. You can love someone sincerely and still have to accept that things didn't work out. Never make someone else's inability to stay the only measure of your worth.
I also wish I could tell you to be patient with your dreams. There will be times when you look around and feel as though everyone is moving forward while you're standing in the same place. Someone will achieve something you've been working towards, someone will seem more confident, and someone will appear to have their entire future figured out. You'll wonder whether you're late, whether you've wasted time, and whether you're doing enough.
But little me, life isn't a race with one finish line. Your journey will have its own delays, unexpected turns, and beginnings you never planned for. You don't need to have everything figured out at an age when you're still learning who you are. Take small steps, ask questions, make mistakes, and begin again when you need to. Progress doesn't always look impressive from the outside.
Please don't forget to enjoy the ordinary days, either. The random conversations at home, laughing until your stomach hurts, your favourite songs playing in the background, and those afternoons when nothing particularly exciting happens. You'll spend so much time waiting for big moments that you might overlook the little ones happening right in front of you. Take more pictures, but remember to live the moments too. Tell people you appreciate them. Ask your grandparents about their childhood. Spend time with the people who make you feel safe. Don't postpone every little happiness until you've achieved something important. You deserve to enjoy your life while you're building it, not only after you've reached your goals.
And please be kinder to yourself. You will make mistakes that embarrass you, decisions you later question, and promises you struggle to keep. You'll have days when you feel proud of yourself and others when you wonder why everything seems so difficult. Neither version of you deserves cruelty. Learn from your mistakes without turning them into reasons to dislike yourself.
Most importantly, don't lose your softness just because life disappoints you sometimes. Keep your kindness, but learn boundaries. Keep your ability to trust, but allow people to earn it. Keep dreaming, but remember that you are allowed to change your dreams as you discover more about yourself.
I can't promise that growing up will be easy. I can't promise that everything you've wished for will happen exactly as you imagined. But I can tell you that you'll learn things about yourself that you cannot understand yet. You'll become more aware of what matters, what deserves your energy, and what you need to let go of.
So, little me, take your time. You aren't supposed to know everything. You aren't supposed to be perfect. And you certainly aren't supposed to become someone else just to prove that you're growing.
One day, you'll look back at this version of yourself with a little more understanding. I hope you'll remember how hard you tried, how much you hoped for, and how many things you survived simply by continuing to grow
If I could leave you with just one thought, it would be this: You don't have to become someone extraordinary to deserve an ordinary, peaceful, happy life.
With all the love I hope you'll learn to give yourself,
Your older self. 🤍