tolerance leads to disgust

Sometimes I feel tolerance leads to disgust.

My whole life ive felt this need to tolerate things becayse reacting has always resulted in opposite. In life we reach points such as this when reacting becomes a con, where you reacting becomes a big problem, but in some only reacting helps. When you are bullied in school, you are expect to react but reacting sometimes makes u vulnerable, all your pains come to surface.

As in my face whenever I begged to differ , people painted me bad, like I was supposed to stay quiet and let them do their deed. And this experience is totally personal. Its maybe because I am a awkward a person. I think 10 times before speaking and when I speak the point comes out in a very poorly arranged way and because of that people wish for me to stay quiet. Over time tolerating all this I become disgusted. With my friends if I hated their behavior and I say it out , my emotions would spoil everything, my comprehension makes it poor. But then looking back I feel disgusted that I let it slide and I feel many teenagers feel this . And I really hope to move across this because I wont get this life often, I won't get to live this age. I want to live it freely