Lack of inspiration

Kaya and I had joined the team together. We had seen the ups and downs of the project. Both of us came to the team in the same conditions, our thoughts had aligned and we had become really good friends. Since Kaya was leaving, I was happy for her for the better prospect, little sad because my best friend was leaving. When it was her last day I had taken the lead to buy gifts for her. As token of our friendship I had prepared a greeting card for her and got it signed by everyone in our team.

The last one to sign the card was another colleague Shraddha. When I asked Shraddha to sign it she looked at the card. She was looking at the picture that I had drawn. She was looking at it for a quite some time so I had to ask her, "is everything okay Shraddha?"

That question broke her trance and she look that me, "this card is really beautiful. You and Kaya where really close. I can see how much effort you have put into making her last day memorable. I really like your idea of the handmade card. You are quite talented".

I was flattered, "thank you so much. We are close and that is why I thought something handmade should be given to her. It will really make her happy and she would feel special. I tried to draw something from YouTube I am not sure if I was able to produce the same results. But whatever I have done I believe it is pretty satisfactory, " of course I was not very comfortable with praise.

"It is a really good initiative. It is great to see that at least you have passion for something other than work. Otherwise look at us. We just work here in the office and at home. Besides that we do not feel like doing anything," Shraddha was still looking at the card and speaking with me. I was not able to understand whether Shraddha was giving a back handed complement to me or she was really serious.

Whatever she was thinking I had to make my position clear, "each and every day because of the work it is difficult to find time to do something creative. But once I decide I make sure that I find time for my passion projects. Then it does not matter whether I have to make it even at 3 o'clock in the morning".

Shraddha looked up. She glanced straight into my eyes and said, " I really appreciate you being creative. I never was creative right from my childhood. I never felt like doing anything. I would study only because my parents were strict. I started working because money was needed and not because I was passionate about work. Even right now I feel that everything that I am doing is only to keep going. If someone tells me to drop everything and my Life would still go on, I would quit my job at that very instance. I do not feel inspired for anything. Never in my life I have felt inspired. When I look at you I feel really good because you have passion and creativity, unlike most of us. You bring vibrancy which is completely missing in my life. I really like that about you".

I was really glad to hear many good things about me. Whatever I had done for Kaya it was not to get compliments from others. It was not for praise. It was for my own passion and my bond towards Kaya. But also when I heard from Shraddha that she did does not feel inspired it made me a little sad as well. That very moment I learnt that how important it is to be inspired and inspire others.