Delegating

It was a busy working day. I had a lot of deliverables on my worklist and all were required to be delivered today. My colleague Renuka walked up to me. I had no time to glance at her. While working, I said, "what's up Renuka? What beings you to my desk today?" She would not usually speak unless she wanted a favor.

Renuka was taken aback with my direct question. She put a fake smile and said, "don't say that. I often come to talk to you," she gave a gentle nudge to my shoulder.

"That generally does not happen. Do you want anything? I am quite occupied," I had no time for idle talk.

"Actually.. Do you have some time today? I need your help for a report," she kept looking at me hoping for me to say yes.

"Today is impossible. I don't know if I will have time for dinner," I was still working and speaking without looking at her.

She fidgeted with her dupatta that I saw from the corner of my eyes. "It is something urgent. Can you take out 10 minutes? I will quickly show you and get my doubts clarified", she insisted.

I rolled my eyes thinking, "how difficult it is to understand I am busy. If I had 10 minutes, I will have dinner instead of helping her. I need to think an alternative". I looked away from the screen to see who else was around. "Sarika is there. She could help you with your doubts. She is the expert", for the first time I looked at Renuka. When I spoke, I could see the disappointment in her eyes. But she had no option but to accept help from Sarika.

Next morning, my manager, Suraj called me. In the conference room I saw Renuka with him. Suraj began as soon as we sat down, "Renuka had a concern with your attitude yesterday. I thought it is better to have a clear conversation".

I kept my face straight. I was not going to explain my position. I knew what I did was right. I let Suraj speak without interrupting or reacting, "When Renuka asked for your help yesterday, do you think you handled the situation well?" Suraj asked.

"In my opinion, yes" I kept my answer short. I wanted him to probe.

"Please explain how you think you handled the situation well," Suraj was demanding answers. Renuka still fidgeting with her dupatta and looking down.

"I had multiple deliverables yesterday. Renuka approached me around 5:30, she wanted me to see the report. I told her how occupied I was. Since it was urgent, I asked Sarika to assist. Afterall Sarika is the expert on the team. This is how I handled the situation," I ensured that my anger is not getting reflected in my voice.

"Why couldn't you help her?" Suraj asked me. It made me wonder if he listened to what I said.

"I had a lot of deliverables yesterday. I left from the office at 11:30, I did not even get time for dinner. I had no time," I explained. Now I was getting frustrated.

"We expect more mentorship role from you. We do not want to see you delegating the mentoring tasks to the expert" I could not believe Suraj.

"In that case reduce my deliverables. I cannot work on deliverables along with mentoring. Moreover nobody should expect me to work for 15+ hours and then mentor the new team members," my frustration had piled up and I could not hold it any longer.

"Based on the seniority, you will get the deliverables. We cannot remove that from you," Suraj said as if we were in court and he was defending his client.

"Suraj you are still not getting it. What you are demanding is for a robot not a human" I left the conference room. I was angry but also relieved that I made my position clear.