Betrayed by friends

When I was in college, I had a close group of friends. At least I used to think they are close. I used to share all secrets with them. How much I have studied, what I plan to do in the future, who I have crush on, who is my favourite celebrity, which professor I hate the most - in short everything. They used to tell me a lot too, but not everything. As we completed the college, the betrayals started pouring in.

First betrayal came in form of no show. Once we completed college, all of us got jobs. All got occupied. However, we had made a promise that we will meet at least once in a month. We met a couple of times, but then came no shows. One friend (M) would take a rain check the very last moment. Another friend (R) started following the trend. The third friend (A) would say, meeting was tidious due to distance. The fourth friend (S) stopped replying to texts. So our plan to meet every month stopped after 4 months.

M who was very close in the college became too distant. She stopped calling, responding, or texting. I too stopped calling her because she never called me. I would text on special occasions like festivals or birthdays. She stopped replying "Thank you" to those texts too. She married a guy from our college. He called me to invite to their wedding. M did not call me to tell that she is getting married. That really hurt me.

S was dating a guy who was her childhood friend. However she completely disconnected from us. Nobody knew where she was, where she was working, what does she do. She changed her number and did not share it with any of us.

A was pursuing higher education. We still were in touch. Occassiinal chats or calls - but still we tried to maintain the contact. We still wish each other on birthdays. I have not met her since her wedding which happened 10+ years ago.

R knew that she would get married after the college which she did. She invited our group to her wedding which was in a different city. We could not attend because it was a working day. We apologized for not attending her wedding. When R's daughter was born, she invited A to the naming ceremony but not me. This caused a rift between me and her. I did not say anything back then. But that betrayal felt piercing. I have rarely spoken to her after that. I only wish her on birthday and festivals, nothing else.

Betrayals in friendship hurt a lot. I wish all of my friends on birthday because I think it is a way to telm them I am not like them. I am raised better. I do not care what they think about me, but when anyone would look back there will be one consistent member. That will be me who tried to keep the bond, who tried to keep the promise that we made in the college.