A day of rest

Sunday evening I switched off my laptop. I checked the time, it was 7:30 in the evening. It was dark outside. I was hearing bells everywhere, just telling me that it was the time for lighting up the oil lamps in front of our gods - the daily evening religious ritual.

When I got up from my seat I realised that my back was sore from sitting. Even though it was a Sunday I had still worked. This is how it has been going on for last 5 to 6 months. After leaving my corporate job and starting freelance work, this has become my reality and normalcy. Earlier I used to have Saturdays and Sundays of now I work on all days. With that thought I decided that I am not going to work on Monday. I kept my laptop inside my wardrobe. I was determined that Monday was going to be a day off.

On Monday I woke up as usual at 7 o'clock. I remembered this was supposed to be my day off. I went back to sleep again. Woke up shortly after and made a nice cup of coffee. Having the coffee, sipping it with peace, I was scrolling through the news app. Then I scrolled through the social media platforms. I was telling myself, "there is no need to rush, it is your well deserve holiday. It is a day off and it is today". So strange how I had to convince myself to take a day off and I had to keep on convincing myself to not work.

After the breakfast, I was feeling little empty. I had a strong urge to take out my laptop and start working. After working constantly for a 17 years, it is now difficult for me to sit idle and do nothing. I told myself, "it is not nothing. You are resting. You are a preparing yourself for the tomorrow. So practically you are still working". It is embarrassing to me how each minute my mind has to tell me that it is okay to relax.

After the lunch I was really getting bored. I decided to watch something on the OTT platform. Instead of opening the platform I accidentally opened my work app. I went through the worklist. I responded to some of the emails, I completed a couple of tasks. By the time I realised that it was my day off, I had already completed three hours of work. I felt guilty. Now I did not feel like watching anything on my phone. I kept my phone aside and made my evening coffee.

In the evening I needed a strong motivation to stay away from the work. It was raining heavily outside so I could not step out. So I decided to do something different. I decided to indulge in self care. I prepared a face pack with Fuller's earth (Multani mati). I applied that on my face and lain on my bed for about half an hour. I was listening to the radio and absorbing each melody into my bloodstream, letting it flow through my arteries, and reach all organs. Then it was 8 o'clock, so I decided to start preparing dinner.

After the dinner I still had the urge to check the work app again. But I decided to control that urge. Instead I took out a book from my book shelf. I had read that book several times earlier but now I wanted to read it again. It was the only way to keep me away from my work and I wanted to do that. I read the book for almost 2 hours and I started feeling sleepy. It was 12:30 AM, my day off was now over.

Lying on my bed I was thinking was it really a relaxing day or a day I spent worrying about the work? The answer was little bit of both. That is when I decided that now on every Monday is going to be my day off and it is my action plan to start enjoying the day off.